Tomoko doesn’t mind waiting in the airport, if she can buy a
cup of coffee and eat a croissant in the dining area. There’s a certain pleasure.
“They have a different taste than at home,” she says. It could be that it feels
like a treat: not having to fix it yourself; “Maybe you are paying for the taste,”
she says. It reflects a sense of leisure
and luxury, even if it is at a small scale. “It is like buying self-confidence.”
Self-confidence can happen every day. Having a clean house, making
a nice meal, wearing a well-made comfortable outfit, all make one feel good about oneself.
And music can bring self-confidence. Of course, a well-performed
recital can exude self-confidence. But doing
a good lesson also gives one self-confidence. Being disciplined in practice builds confidence. Sometimes a challenging section
of a piano piece can test one’s self-confidence, but patience and perseverance
can help overcome the difficulty – and improve one’s self-confidence, which
comes from pride in “conquering” that musical challenge.
Once in a while, self-confidence can get in the way of music
appreciation. “Listening to music in a concern is like judging,” Tomoko feels,
especially if it is a piano performance. Being self-confidence can lead to
comparisons and dissatisfaction with that concert: “I am better than the
performer.” Instead, Tomoko prefers watching skating or enjoying an opera; it’s
a way to not feel obligated to judge. Rather, Tomoko can appreciate the skater’s
or singer’s own self-confidence.
Tomoko helps her students develop self-confidence by both
challenging them and supporting them so they too can master a piano piece. “The
best self-confidence comes from self-competence,” thinks Tomoko. In that respect,
self-confidence is no luxury: it’s a vital part of one’s self-identity.
